START OF THE PANDEMIC
The pandemic has forced many teachers to pursue online teaching opportunities. It’s different, but it doesn’t mean less impact (even though at times it feels that way.) When I realized that we may not be going back to the classroom, I was honestly in tears. I wonder how I made my students feel on the last day we were together. I wonder how they would cope during the lockdown. And I wonder how I would survive each day without looking forward to sharing conversations with these small but intelligent human beings. The classroom has become my home. Its walls were all designed with each child in mind–what they like and what they need to learn. The first day I entered to clean up broke me. My identity has become my being a teacher. So what now?
I’ve jumped from one freelance job to another. You do what you need to to survive, I guess. Every job was different. But none like the one I have with my children. If there is one thing I am sure of about me, it’s that I was born to teach children.

MY NEW SCHOOL AND NEW EXPERIENCES THAT CAME WITH IT
After what seemed like a roller coaster of pandemic events, I got a phone call from a former co-teacher and long-time friend to teach at her school. I thought, finally…something close to normal. Since in the Philippines, schools are not allowed to have face-to-face classes yet, we did everything online. It was a lot of learning and unlearning for me. I had to learn how to give numerical grades, make worksheets (which I got away with not making all these years because I always assessed through games), teach older kids, edit videos, and so much more. It was really challenging at first (still is but much, much less). On my first week, I got so mixed up with what subjects I was teaching that I had totally missed making videos for one subject. There were also a few times in the beginning when I submitted late, and if you know me or listen to my podcast, you would know that I absolutely hate the idea of Filipino time. I was given much grace by the principal and my co-teachers, which I really praise God for.
I have, for the first time, filled up a whole planner. I learned how to edit, manage zoom. I got to explore many, many resources. Ones I would have never heard of if I wasn’t teaching online. My Thursdays and Fridays have blended together like JeremyBeremy. In a way, I can say I grew so much as a person and a teacher this year. There is something exceptional and unique about this school, but that’s for another post.

MY REALIZATIONS AS WE CLOSE THIS YEAR
I always said that my favorite part of being a teacher is having to decorate my classroom. Over the whole pandemic craziness, I realized this is far from true. I cherish the time I have with my kids, even though it has been limited to 30-minute zoom calls. I look forward to it. Even on days when they are not in the mood, I intentionally understood that being stuck at home is hard. Pandemic really blows, but these conversations with kids have kept me going so much as the breakfasts with my preschoolers pre-pandemic has. Sadly, I didn’t get the opportunity to get to know all my students really well. Some of them remain names on a worksheet, but I am grateful that I still get to read their thoughts. Children have always amazed me with their potential to learn and grow. I have always admired them for the way they observe and question the world around us. But this year, I think I have admired children even more for their resilience and ability to not go crazy over not having school, continuing their education no matter how different it is. What amazes me most is how they never fail to mention teachers in their prayer requests. It’s just so touching how they think of us when they have their own struggles to deal with.

My biggest takeaway for this year is that I will always love my students no matter what. It doesn’t matter what their ages are; they always mean the world to me. It doesn’t make any difference if I get to spend the whole day with them or just 30 minutes each week. Because of this, I know schools may close at any time. I know teachers never earn as much. But I am happy to do what I’m meant to do. I can’t wait to see how God’s power unfolds in each of their lives.